Right now both of my babies are asleep. I say babies but really, Kaysen is so grown up already and Gage is right behind him.
A month ago I was complaining because Kaysen wasn't interested in potty training, now he runs to the bathroom saying, "I do it by meee self!" He is such a determined and independent little boy. Nothing gets in his way...and I mean NOTHING.
I believe Gage will be following in his brothers footsteps. I have been saying that he is the calm one of the two of them. This might be true...to an extent. The older he gets the more he REALLY lets me know what he wants, and when and how he wants it. And he can't even talk yet!
Because of Kaysen's determination, and Gage's new found attitude (and vocal abilities) I have many unnerving moments.
Moments when I can't wait until Jerry walks through the door, or for bedtime to finally be here.
Moments when I just go to my moms house so that I can have a little bit of a break and someone else to vent to. Moments when I put both kids in the car seat and go for a drive. (luckily both of my kids like the car and will usually fall asleep if they are in it for more than 10 minutes.) Moments when I count to 100 or go to my bathroom for just couple of seconds of "quiet" time. Moments when I have picked up toys for the 20th time that day. And most of all...moments when I wonder if I really know what I am doing and if I am doing it right.
Then there are those moments when I sit next to Kaysen's bed and read his "two books" to him and then sing "Child of God." Or the moments when he is at home with Daddy, (who happens to be his favorite person) and then I walk through the door and he says, " I missed you Mommy." Moments when Kaysen says his sweet little prayers all by himself before bed and he blesses the food and Gage. Or the moments when he runs into my room to wake me up and he plants a big, slobbery kiss on my cheek and says, "Wake up Mommy! Wake up!" (trust me, I'm always awake before he makes it to my bedroom door, I just lay there for the kiss.) Moments when I walk into a room and Gage's face instantly lights up and drool runs out of his mouth because his smile is so big. Then moments when Gage babbles "mammmaaaamammmaa."
These moments are what makes all of the fit throwing, yelling, screaming, house cleaning and crying worth it. These are the moments that get me by and the moments I live for.
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2 comments:
Oh boy, I hear ya! Sometimes I look around at the end of the day and wonder if I got anything done at all and I'm so exhausted! But it is worth it -so so worth it.
I love the picture of them together. They are handsome boys for sure. And the picture in the last post of all the Millers and their babies is awesome! It's so cool.
wow you said it all didn't you. I am so sorry about yesterday and not recognizing you. That was so weird. I feel really bad. You just look so different. I guess we all kind of look different and grown up huh..well I hope I do and not like the snotty teenager I was. It was good to talk to you and see you and your fat little dude. Wait your fat big dude. he is so dang cute.
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