I'm learning too...

Kaysen has been making his own bed for quite some time now.  He really does a great job at it too. We just recently redecorated and rearranged the boys room though and it is much harder for him to make his bed that is now smashed between the wall and the dresser.  He has figured out a system though and is doing great again, although it can be a painstaking process. You see, Kaysen is like me. Picky. If I just mention that the bottom of his bed is still showing,or if he notices a big wrinkle he'll fix it until it is gone, his pillows go exactly how he wants them along with any animals that may want to stay on his bed that day.  Many times, by the time he is done making his bed he is really frustrated...and then I end up getting frustrated.

 Gage on the other hand still needs a bit of help. He wants to do it by himself, and I've been trying to let him.

 Then later I go in a fix it a bit.  This has  been making him a little upset.  He liked it the way it was when he did it and thought he did such a good job, which he did. However, he is not like me. He is not picky when it comes to where things go or how they are done.  He just wants it done how he does it, not how someone else does it. Which most times, how he gets something done is not how I would do it or want it. Thus causing more frustration. He could care less if the bottom of the bed shows, or if wrinkles are showing, and he definitely doesn't care how is animals or pillows are placed.

I am learning that both of my boys and I are much happier if I am not in the room when they are making their beds.  Kaysen works on it until it is good enough for him. Which ends up being pretty dang close to good enough for me.  Gage just makes his as he wants and then will ask for help "getting it flat." I've noticed that as long as he asks me for help, then it is okay for me to straighten up his bed a bit. His pillows are still just randomly placed but oh well. At least they are on the bed. 

I know. You're thinking I'm way OCD. I'm really not....that bad.  At least I never thought I was and I know I could be way worse. My boys are teaching me to let the little stuff slide. They are learning how to get things done on their own.  That's the only way they are going to learn it too. If I go in and FIX everything they do, they'll think that what they do isn't good enough for me and they will quit wanting to do the things I ask them to do.  I should just be happy that they are willing to make their bed each morning and pick up their toys each night. Even if both things aren't done exactly how I want. It is getting done and they are doing a great job of it.

I was told that once I had two kids my pickiness would fade. It didn't. If anything it got worse. Now people are telling me that I'll be so busy with twins and my other two boys that I won't care at all. I really don't see that happening. But I sure am going to try to not flip out about stuff so much. I know I'll be a lot more sane and my boys will be a lot more happy if learn to just chill.

I'm learning that as a Mom, I'm still learning too and my kids are my greatest teachers.

Stuck...

Every evening Jerry and I used to hop on the quads and take the boys and Ruger out for a ride on our property. Now, however, I can't really do it. The bumps absolutely kill me and although I have fun riding, getting off the quad and walking are much to hard. So nowadays Jerry just takes the boys out.

Tonight I sat at home while they rode when suddenly I got a phone call from Jerry.

"I'm stuck."

"You're kidding," I reply. This guy never gets stuck and he's quite a prankster so I thought he really was just teasing me.

"Nope. I'm in the wash. Bring the truck some muletape and my leatherman and get me out."

I laughed...and then complied.

Yesterday we had one heck of a rain storm. On our property is a little wash that used to have a dam that held the water in so that it was a little pond. Well one REALLY good rain storm a while back washed most of that dam out. Yesterday's rain storm finished the job. Kaysen asked Jerry if they could drive through where the dam used to be. So away they went. They made it most of the way. I guess, when suddenly the quad just sunk in the mud and no amount of coercion would get it out. The mud was definitely 3/4 of the way up the tires.

So I backed our truck up as close as possible. Jerry cut some muletape and tied it to the quad. One little tug later and it was free. The boys thought it was such an adventure. Jerry told me not to post it...sorry babe. It's a good memory that our boys love talking about.


Jerry spent the next hour cleaning all of the mud off and wasn't in that great of a mood as he cleaned.

This 'n That.....

Today we had one heck of a rain storm. It really only lasted for about 30-45 minutes but this is the lake that was in our back yard after it. Our boys were having the time of their life just walking around in the mud and water.





Note: Gage is in this new stage. He wants to change his clothes a million times a day and is very picky about which clothes he wants to change into. All of which happen to be clothes that are a) pajamas or b) do not match at all. I'm a little picky about matching clothes. I know I need to let my kids be kids but this is something I really struggle with. Kaysen never really did this type of thing. He has wanted to wear some pretty strange things...like snow boots with shorts. Or my personal favorite...a really tight belt with his shirt tucked in and his pants pulled up a bit too high....or he loves to wear long socks with shorts. I don't know why that one bothers me so much but it REALLY does. I'm figuring out that my boys are starting to get older and want to do things their own way. Kaysen is the kind of boy that will choose what he wants to wear each day, but if I hint to him it doesn't match, 90% of the time he'll change it. He sticks to what I want, because it makes me happy (I'm selfish huh?) and in the end, he makes choices that I would make. Now he will only wear certain shirts with certain pants/shorts. And when Gage chooses something that doesn't match it really bothers him too. He is so OCD like me its funny....sometimes. Gage on the other hand, could care less about anything. If he wants it, he wants it. Regardless of anything...there's hardly any room for negotiations with that boy. Just one more way to show how different my boys are already.

This is the 4th outfit of the day for Gage....


Right here Kaysen is telling me that he "hates that dang dog because he stinks so bad." Yes it has been quite some time since Ruger has gotten a bath but I really think that even if he would have gotten one in the past week he would still have that "wet dog" smell that all dogs have when they are wet. It's not appealing to me at all and I don't blame Kaysen for not liking it either. I did try to talk the word "hate" down to "don't like" and focus on not liking the smell vs. not liking Ruger.

And here is a little bit better picture of me at 27 weeks. It's a bit more in focus, and at least my hair is pulled back and I have some mascara on.

I have been "nesting" for a few weeks now. Except I'm not really nesting because I can't get anything done. Our addition isn't done, and I've come to face the fact that it probably won't be done before these little ones arrive. I'm okay with that. They can sleep in our room for a few months, they would be doing that in our new room anyways, the only difference is our new room is bigger.

The part that really gets to me is that I can't get their clothes, blankets and other "stuff" organized yet because I have no where to put it. They will be using the closet that we are currently occupying. We have no other place to put our clothes until our addition is done. So I've been going a bit crazy.

Finally, I bought a new dresser for Kaysen and Gage today. They just had this itty bitty one that is perfect for babies. It literally held their pajamas, socks and underwear. They are now nearly 3 and 5 years old. Their clothes were just getting too big for it. All shirts are hung up and all pants have been on shelves in their closet. Now, they have a bigger dresser that holds all of their pajamas, pants, undies and socks. Shirts are still hung up because its much easier to keep them nice and organized that way.

By moving their pants I was able to fit baby blankets in on the shelves, plus I was able to make more room for the boxes of diapers I have stored and will continue to store.

Tomorrow we are going to buy a matching dresser and it will be for the twins clothes. We were just going to have them use the old small one, but that was when I thought I'd have a whole closet to put the rest of their clothes and supplies in. So now all hats, gloves, belts and shoes are in this small dresser and it has changed the look of thier closet. I wish I would have taken a before and after picture to show my accomplishments.

I honestly can't express how much organizing just these couple things have brought my stress level down. As Jerry has pointed out to me in the past couple years...I am a bit OCD about certain things and things like this just happen to be one of them. I have to have things in the right place, or I go crazy.

When thinking of preparing for these little ones is this what I pictured?

Definitely not.

Do I wish we were in our new room?

You betcha. That extra space and new bathroom would be HEAVEN.

Do I wish I had their room set up completely?

You got it. I'd love to have those cribs up, rooms decorated and clothes organized.

But alas, I don't have any of these things and I just gotta deal with it. My husband is over here bustin his little rear end off trying to get us in that new room and I'm sure that me being little miss antsy pants isn't helping any. (although I'm pretty proud of myself for not nagging on him much at all...he just knows me and knows it's making me crazy.) But we are getting one step closer and boy am I grateful....as I am sure Jerry is too.

Play Doh Art...

Today we pulled out the play doh. It hasn't been used in quite some time and the last time it was used Kaysen was the only one interested in playing with it. That was not the case today. Gage was loving it. He made about 20 different animals, then cut them all up with a plastic knife.



Kasyen has been so much more interested in "art stuff" lately. He loves drawing and will actually try to draw by himself now, instead of asking Jerry or I to draw something for him. Today he initially set off making all of the dinosaurs he could. Then evolved into more intricate work.


I was sitting on the couch for a minute and he yelled, "Hey Mom! I made Jesus! Come look." So off I went to see what he created.

This is what he made....

The owl is Jesus on the cross. The red "t" is the cross and the blue rings around the arms are the cords they used to bind Jesus up on the cross. (I'm hoping this isn't sacrilegious.) My son has been so interested in the story of the resurrection ever since Easter and here he is a month later still remembering the story. So although Christ is depicted as an owl...at least my son is getting the point, in a round about way. He sure was excited and begged me to take a picture so we could show Daddy once he got home from work.

A Cry in the Night...

At approximately 3:35am I was brought out of my slumber to the sound of screaming. Not just the normal, "Mom!" sound. I mean an absolutely scared scream. It came from Gage. Many times all a scream from him means is that he is tired but needs to go to the bathroom. He doesn't want to wet the bed, but he doesn't want to get out either. I thought this was the reason for the scream although this scream was a bit different.

I went into his room to comfort him and try to talk him into going to the bathroom and he just kept saying, "I want kabiblaboibl" I really had no clue what the boy wanted. He was crying so hard I couldn't understand him and this just made him even more angry. I convinced him to go to the bathroom thinking this might help him. It calmed him down while he did his business but then the cries came back tenfold.

So I started throwing out words like, mom, dad, drink, bathroom, bear. Each one was met with a resounding "NOOOOO! I want kabkidelies" Finally, I said, "You want Kaysen."

"Yes" was the answer in the most sincere voice. So, we went into his bedroom and I showed him that Kaysen was sound asleep on his bed. This pacified him enough to get back on his bed, and was soon relaxed. Kaysen however was awake and let me know it when I started walking out the door. How could he not be after those screams? He asked what was wrong with Gage and I told him that Gage just wanted him. Kaysen replied, "It's okay Gage. I'm right here in our room by you bud." Gage replied, "Okay." To which Kaysen said, "I love you bud" and Gage sweetly said, "I lub you tooooo."

I laid on my bed wide a wake for sometime after that thinking of how much that little episode touched me. I remember being pregnant with Gage and secretly hoping for a girl so that I could have at least one of each. As soon as I knew he was a boy I was excited about the fact that they would be good friends one day. I just pictured that day being when they were quite a bit older. However, a bond has been there from day one. Those boys know each other inside and out and love each other unconditionally and it couldn't make me happier.

Even when this bond makes me wake up from a blissfull night of sleep. :)

Tidbits of Yesterday...

We started off the morning watering our trees and garden and then...
being Super Man.

Followed by a nice (unplanned) water day at Grandma Miller's house.

Like I said...unplanned. Gage was running around in his pants that were soon covered with mud so we stripped him down to his undies and shirt, then eventually just undies. Kaysen finally gave in and borrowed a pair of swim trunks from a cousin.

Where there is water there is....MUD. And Kaysen sure found it. This isn't even the worst of it. A mere 5 minutes later his arms were completely covered in black/brown muck. He found the mud in the garden. Smelled wonderful. I sprayed him down with a hose before he was allowed in the car.



After Grandma's we headed to Speedy's to get a "Push Up Pop." My boys FIRST Push Up Pop. They were in heaven.



We headed home and were ready to wait the 2 hours until Dad got home from work, but instead we got an unplanned dinner invitation from Greg and Cayla.



The boys and I headed over to their house and Dad met us there after work. We ate PRIME RIB...mmmm. Salad. Potatoes. Asparagus. Pink Lemonade. Peach Cobbler.

Cayla and I proceeded to lose at Wahoo again. On Friday we had Greg & Cayla over for Mexican BBQ and we taught them how to play Wahoo. Men vs. Women. Men won first game and Cayla and I came out of nowhere and won the second. Then they won the third. So last night we were out for revenge but unfortunately we didn't have enough revenge built up in our system because we lost again.

We left their home at 10:30pm which happens to be at least 1 1/2 hours past my present bedtime. I think our whole family fell asleep within 2 minutes of our heads hitting the pillow. I got to sleep until 7:50 when my boys finally woke up. Jerry however had to get up at 5:45 for work. He's gonna be tired today.

So yesterday I loved that it was so beautiful outside (NO WIND and 76 degrees) that my boys were playing out there all day.

Then I loved that we had a delicious dinner with good friends.

Mostly I loved that I didn't even gag last night. (Night time is now the worst time for me but I may just be on the down hill slide now becasue it's slowly getting better)

When Mom is Gone...

On Sunday mornings I have choir practice at 9:00 am.

Jerry was in charge of getting the boys out of the bath while I went to choir practice and copied off my ward bulletins.

Upon pulling up my driveway this is the view I beheld....

Kaysen and Gage wanted to go outside and help Dad feed Ruger.

We usually don't let our kids get dressed for a bit because if we do, their church clothes are trashed.

So Gage pulled on a robe and tennis shoes.

Kaysen opted to go shirtless, but pulled on my boots and made sure to get Dad's knee brace.

They sure thought they looked stylish.

First Snowman...

It is so sad to say that this is Gage's first snowman.

And it is also sad to say that this is Kaysen's second snowman. (his first being in Jan 2008)

You see, last winter I was in the process of moving and no good snow storms came along until after we moved. Now we live in the desert (pretty much) and we just don't get the snow accumulation of the White Mountain area where I was raised.

Here my boys wake up to 1-2 inches of snow on the ground and think they are in heaven and can create a HUGE snowman. They are sorely dissapointed when noon comes around and the snow is gone.

They stayed with my mom this past weekend and the snow hadn't quite melted yet so I made sure to pack their snow clothes (which don't get used here much, besides the boots they both love to wear everyday) My mom took pics of the boys with their snowman on her phone but unfortunately forgot to save the pics so all we have are pics of the snowman.

But man is Kaysen excited whenever he sees this picture. Him and Gage want to go to Grandma's house again to build another one. I'm hoping that can happen again this winter, because I'd love to be out there creating another masterpiece with them.

Moments...

Today during lunch my boys were very grouchy.

I mean VERY.

In turn, I was becoming grouchy.

I decided it was time for naps.

Kaysen wanted me to lay by him.

Gage wanted to lay by Kaysen.

So I left the room and let the two brothers fall asleep next to each other but highly doubting that they would. They usually just end up playing with each other.

2 minutes later I peek in their room and find them like this....


And they stayed that way for over an hour...until Kaysen woke up because his arm fell asleep from Gage laying on it. I was temped to move Gage so they would sleep longer, but in the end I decided I loved the sight of them being so sweet, way too much to change it.

Luckily they woke up much happier, and to a Mom that was much happier also.


Tonight as I was working on crafts I let the boys watch Dora on Netflix. They were pumped because this doesn't happen very often. (We don't have cable, so they get kinda bored with the same movies over and over.) They hadn't watched much t.v. yet today, Jerry was at work, and I needed to get work done so out came Dora.

As I'm painting I hear Kaysen say, "Gagers. Hey buddy. You wanna sit on my lap?"
Gage says, "yeah!"
Kaysen replies, "Well come here then." and pats his legs.

I walk in to find this...


Gage has his very own chair right next to Kaysens but he opts to sit on Kaysen's lap. Gage is so big Kaysen is barely peeking around his shoulder to see the t.v.

I love moments like these two. Moments when I'm so glad that I have two little boys that are already growing into the best of friends.

Brothers...

We had the opportunity to listen to our prophet and apostles from the comfort of our living room this weekend. Jerry was at work so it was up to me to get Kaysen and Gage to sit somewhat still for 2 hours.

So before conference I showed pictures of King Benjamin and told Kaysen the story of how everyone made tents to sit in as they listened to King Benjamin. Then I asked him if he wanted to make a tent and sit in it while we listened to our prophet?

What do you think the answer was???

It went something like....a jump in the air with an arm thrusted upwards and a "YEAHHHH!" As he ran in the kitchen to help move chairs.



2 minutes later we had our tent....

And it actually worked at keeping them still, as long as the had snacks to eat as they listened. Gage was a bit harder to work with but Kaysen actually did so good.

At one point Kaysen was starting to move around quite a bit so I said, "Kaysen, you need to be reverent and listen. Do you now what they are talking about?"

He replies, (with attitude) "Yeah. He's talking about Joseph Smith Mom. You know that guy that saw Jesus."

Hmmm...I guess he does listen. Many times, better than I do.

Helpers...

I have recently started making crafts and selling them for Embellish Boutique in Lakeside. I've been super busy with ideas and creations.

Of course as I work I have to keep 2 little boys occupied. I must admit, many times I do it with Dora, Diego or Mickey. But today I decided that they had had enough of that.

So we headed outside to paint.

I need to paint blocks... (like this and more)

Gage needed to paint...well everything.


Kaysen needed to paint the same piece of wood...about 13 times.

But you know what?

They did great and had so much fun...and I was able to work and play with my boys today.

Looks like we'll be bringing out the painting clothes a lot more often. :)

Rough Day...

I believe that I spent 90% of my day yelling.

I know...I'm horrible.

It just seemed that neither one of my boys wanted to listen to a word that I said.

And after saying the same thing oh about 15 times, I just started getting a tad impatient.

I tried so hard to get my boys to take a nap.

The needed one.

I hoped they would wake up happy.

I needed one.

I hoped I would wake up happy.

After over an hour, the nap never came.

I figured it was useless to fight anymore. Usually they are asleep within 5 minutes of just sitting still on the couch.

I finally gave up.

I continued cleaning my house and all the many other things that needed done.

Finally it was time to do dishes.

My boys were arguing horribly by now...about EVERYTHING.

"He's touching me."

"He's taking my toy."

"Gage, stop!"

"AHHHH!!! MIIINNNNEE!"

"I want that."

"I had it first"

After each incident they would come running to me wanting my intervention. I told them I wouldn't listen. I was tired of them fighting and told them to work it out between themselves.

This did the trick.

Eventually they left each other alone.

5 minutes later this was what my house looked like...

It was heavenly.

I still continued to clean, and didn't get the nap that I really wanted.

But when my boys woke up they were much happier.

And so was I.

Current Favorites...

My boys are LOVING the warm weather we are experiencing.

They are already getting nice little farmers tans on their little arms and neck.

Right now these are things we do on a daily basis to keep sane.

Here Kaysen is telling Ruger, "Down! Ruger!" This was only about 3 days after we got Ruger and Kaysen was still a bit scared but getting better.

Now, 10 days later, Ruger is still alive and both of our boys are LOVING Ruger. Kaysen loves to run around as Ruger chases him all over the place. Gage gets a bit scared if Ruger jumps on him but is getting pretty good at pushing him off. He actually initiates the petting now, even when Ruger is walking, instead of us telling him to do it while we are holding Ruger.

We bought puppy treats for Ruger to teach him to sit and stuff and planned on giving them to him for training. However, I have two little boys that love to sneak into the garage and get a few "bones" as they call them and proceed to feed Ruger. They actually even hold it the whole time and let Ruger bite it out of their hands now instead of dropping them on the ground. It makes to happy to see that they love Ruger now...but at this rate I'll be broke from buying puppy treats.

We bought a swing set a couple weeks ago and this is the Number ONE toy of choice for Gage. He could slide and swing all day if I'd let him.

I love this picture. It looks like he is tipping his hat at me before he goes down the slide.

Jerry was digging (yes still) on our trench and as he did it he was making mounds of new dirt. Kaysen saw this as a jumping opportunity and continually tried to jump it on his four wheeler. He never made it quite to the top but he thought he was pretty dang cool.

Here is our mighty hunter. This little boy could shoot a gun or bow all day long. He loves hunting. Look at that professional stance...Uncle Chad gave this bow and arrow to him last week and EVERY single day he has to shoot it. (if the wind doesn't blow too hard to do it)Kaysen shoots at an old cardboard box and although he hits it all over the place...at least he is hitting it. He tells us he is practicing so that he can shoot a rabbit or deer.

This is just a pic of Gage being his silly self. That boy makes me laugh all the time.

The Easter Bunny brought these awesome buckets.

They were a major hit with my boys....Ruger too. (he loves to chew on them)

I love the sanity that returns to my house (and my brain) when the warm weather arrives. :)

Since I've been gone...

Many exciting things have happened in the Miller home...

On New Years Eve we finally moved into our new house. Here is a picture of the living room. Without any of my decorations in place. Since this picture was taken I have covered the walls in pictures and decorations which is a good thing because I go crazy when my walls are bare.

Here is our new kitchen. (Ignore the fact that the picture is crooked.)

That is pretty much it in the photo department for now because all other rooms are not yet complete. Maybe someday I'll get around to posting them....

Also, while I was gone we celebrated Christmas!!!

We made ginger bread houses at Grandma & Grandpa Millers house. Its pretty sad to say that this is the first one I have ever made. It turned out pretty good. Especially since Jerry and I had a company dinner to go to the night this was planned so we did ours after everyone left and 90% of the candy was used/eaten. I don't know what my boys enjoyed more, making the house or eating the candy. What I do know is that they were up until 11:30 playing because they were a bit too hyped up...Ugh that was a long night!

Here are the boys in their matching Santa jammies. Kaysen thought it was sooo cool that him and Gagers matched. Now every time one of them wears them for bed he thinks the other one has to also.

We woke up Christmas morning to some pretty amazing presents. At first Kaysen just stared at his 4 wheeler and wasn't too sure if he wanted to get on...simply because he was cranky. Gage was wide awake and ready to get the day going but Kaysen wanted to keep sleeping. I was too excited to let Kaysen keep sleeping so I made him come downstairs too. As soon as Kaysen saw his black helmet hanging on the handle bars he was excited. That is what he really asked Santa for. His cousins have some helmets, more specifically a black one that is a bit too big for Kaysen, but he loves to wear it. He would sleep in it if I'd let him. He thinks it makes him go faster...and "I gotta be safe mom."

Gage hopped right on his 4 wheeler, even though he didn't have a clue how to drive it at first. We had some near fatal accidents (jk) in that small living room on Christmas morning.

Kaysen and Gage have loved living here I think. Kaysen loves that he can ride his 4 wheeler all over. We have 10 acres with no fences so he just goes & goes. He also loves that he has 16 cousins, 7 of which are his age, that he can play with all the time. He constantly asks if one of them can come over or if he can go to their house. It is great to see them have fun, even if there are a few arguments while playing.

(I love that I can see Jerry's work in the background of this picture...that means that he is only 5 minutes from work. I also love that I can see Cody and Kylie's house...that means they aren't too far away if I ever need them. I think Kylie and I both love this part. Plus we get to go walking and to volleyball together a couple days a week. I'm lovin it!)

Gage is getting better at driving his 4 wheeler, he just has zero steering capabilities. He usually rides his for 5 minutes or so then moves on to better things...at least what he calls better things.

Like...raking the dirt. I really took this picture to show what the view is out my front window. No it isn't beautiful...well except in the spring when it is all covered in green with spotted yellow, white and purple flowers...then I think that it isn't too bad. Also when I watch the sunrise coming over the hills. I tease Jerry saying that this must be the Land of Desolation the Book of Mormon speaks of...jk.

I do love that I can see this far away and know that my family has plenty of room to roam. One day Jennie and Jeremy will have a little bungalow against that hillside.

Jerry and I also celebrated our 5th anniversary!!! It is oh so crazy to think that it has been that long yet seems like it has been longer on some days. Thanks to Tia & Merrick watching our boys, we were able to go out to dinner. It was great! The past 5 years have brought us some trials but it has also been the most fulfilling 5 years of my life. I can't wait to do 5 more...at least 10 more times!!!

Also, Gage is getting sooo interested in potty training. After every incident in his diaper he runs to the toilet and has to sit on it. He also wants to wear Kaysen's big boy undies, even over his clothes. If he sees a pair hes screaming, trying to pull them on. I'm all for potty training...I just think its crazy because he is only 16 months old. I'm not going to push it...just keep him interested. Then MAYBE this summer when I'm done with school I will venture on into that department.

To sum it all up I think that ALL of us love our new home & town. It really does feel like home and where we are supposed to be. I miss Show Low and my family but know that this will be so much better for us.

Jerry has this week off and I REALLY don't know what I am going to do with myself. We have no traveling that we have to do. We can just simply work on our house HERE TOGETHER, eat meals TOGETHER and sit back and relax TOGETHER!! Its going to be GREAT!!!

(p.s. Happy B-day Jennie!!)

One of those days....

Have you ever had one of those days where you can't wait for bedtime to come????





Well....




Today was NOT one of those days for me!! :)

Some People Say...

They look like him....

Others say they look like me....

All I know is....

they are FLIPPIN' cute!!!